sleep

sleep is perhaps one of the greatest waste of time and one of the things that i enjoy the most in life and, at the same time, wish that i could do without. i enjoy sleep because it is easy, relaxing, and refreshing. yet there is a major flaw with sleep. you have to do it. i wish that i could only sleep if i wanted to so that i could stay up all night, at times, and read to my hearts content. at other times i could then sleep and be no less tired. i do concede that it is a necessary evil that is good for us and shows our dependency upon God to sustain us and that we really can't do anything on our own. it is a really lame thing to have to spend a third of our time unconscious because we were made that way, slightly ironic.

it is good to think upon all the little things that God has put into our lives to make it so that we rely upon Him. sleep being one, but then also eating, drinking, breathing. these are all things that God designed for our survive, dependance, and also enjoyment. oh that we serve a Being that love us so much so as to give us things that we would not imagine for our enjoyment so that we have yet another thing to give Him praise for. to have a God who knows us perfectly and gives us only the things that will make us more like Him in the end - if we are His children.

it is interesting and fun to think that one day, we will be like God in a more close sense, for while now we are similar to His slightly, for we are created in Him image. one day we will be perfect and that will allow us to commune with Him which will be glorious. the things of this world will pass away and be replaced with a new world where we will be serving and praise God for all eternity and that will completely satisfy us to the fullest. we will want nothing more. i'm excited, hopeful, and longing after that time that is to come. we are here for a mere moment before we pass into eternity. make this moment count for it is the only one that has any influence upon the eternity to come.

hard times

while easy times are, in fact, easy. hard times are much better for the christian walk because hard times make us realize our dependency upon God. we should not get depressed in hard times as much as we should pray, for pray can move mountains while depression kills souls.

a light re-lite

tonight, anne heartline passed away from a long bout with cancer. anne was my 3rd and 4th grade sunday school teacher. she has impacted hundreds of young kids for Christ through that ministry. she has also been in and out of hospitals for over 12 years (i'm not sure the count) and has impacted hundreds of people through that ministry as well. she has been encouraging and witnessing to patients and doctors the whole time. this lady lived this life in light of the next, and while she has passed away, she is now in heaven with God, which is must more glorious and where she would rather be even if she was health. this lady, anne, did not live her life for comfort, for money, or even for family, or for anything in this life. she lived this life knowing full well what is coming after this life. she lived for significance rather then success.

now then, how should we live our lives? how are you living your life? are you living to see how much stuff you can get or how many friends you can make on facebook? or do you live your life trying to impact the future? does your life have meaning? you must ask yourself this question. do not continue going through life living for yourself. you must do something more. see reason. to waste a life on things to gratify yourself when they won't even fulfill you is not a life but a depression. to look for meaning in places that will drive you everywhere but where actually meaning exist is not good but a journey that will quickly wane to the point of failure.

look to something better. anne looked to one thing and this one thing, she wanted everyone that she ever met to know about this thing because she knew that this thing could and would satisfy everyone for eternity. she knew that you would have to look not further in order to find the meaning in your life, that you could actually then live a life that is worth living. she pointed towards Christ. she lived for Him and she lived Him out. she did not merely claim Christ but she walked with Him. her life had meaning because of this. her life will be remember with this in mind. everyone who knows her will remember this about her, this is what she would want to be remember: Christ, not her. she would rather have you look at Christ then anything that she ever did. so i ask you now, look to Christ. stop living for this life and start to live for the next. live for significance and not for success. live with purpose. live with joy. live with Christ.

belief = something else

acts 16:31 "believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved..."

this post will focus basically entirely on the word "believe" just so that you who are reading this will be aware.

webster's new world dictionary definition of believe: to take as true, real; to trust a statement or promise of (a person); to suppose or think; to have faith

vine's concise dictionary of the bible: greek word pisteuo meaning to believe, to be persuaded of, to place confidence in, to trust, signifies reliance upon, not mere credence.

while i would say that these definitions are similar, the english definition is slightly misleading to the point of the verse. i would truly love to unpack this word and shed some light on what i believe this verse is meaning.

i have no idea how long i have been saved and if you were to hear my testimony, you would understand why i have a hard time pin-pointing my conversion. however, i do know that i have been saved for the past year and a half and i have been putting in quite a bit of study time since then, trying to make up for wasted, lost time in my life. in the time, i have yet to read, heard, or experienced anything that is contrary to what i am thinking about this passage.
in salvation, we have something glorious, something that we should not want to give away for any reason, a thing that brings us untamable joy and assurance, a relationship with Christ.
i enjoy sitting a sipping at a nice, hot cup of coffee, i like the taste of it and i really like the caffeine that is in it that wakes me up so that i can actually function through out the day. i bring this up because, while this is simplified, Christ should be the same way for us. we should crave those quiet time with Him, He should be our sustenance for the day, that thing that gets us through a long hard day. He is always with us through prayer and meditation on scripture.
there is only one way to get through life, present and eternal, and that way is through Christ. as acts 16:31 says, all we must do it to believe on Christ. yet what does that constitute. there are no qualifiers or limiters in this verse on this phrase so that has to mean that we must believe on Christ to the fullest extent. not only that He created the world, but that He can and is the only one to save us. i think that many of us see both of those though and we can reckon with that and still live life basically the way that we want. however, Christ doesn't want us to live the life that we want, He wants us to live the life that He wants (because it is best for us but i won't get into that in this post).
God created us in His image. He created us for His glory. how do we bring glory to Him? by worshiping, praising, and living for Him, but making Him our all. this is what we are to do. when we say that we believe in Him (a believe that leads to eternal life), we are also saying that we believe that He is the only person in whom we can find enjoyment.
He must be the only thing that we find joy in. this doesn't mean that all we do is read our bibles and pray all day, but that in everything we do, we realize that it is truly from God, that we wouldn't have it unless He gave it to us, and we are enjoying it in a way that would please Him, and praise Him and thank Him for it. it is not enough to live a life that upholds the law of scripture if we do not have the attitude of scripture as well. if you up hold every outward law, yet partake in every inward law, then you are a white-washed tomb, full of dead men's bones, on the slow and easy path to eternity to hell.
wake up and smell the roses and the sweet life that could be yours in Christ. this world only looks appealing until you've tasted, chewed, and digested the goodness of Christ.


(while writing this, my mind wasn't working well, and i was slightly, completely scatter-brained so hopefully this makes sense.)

power of prayer

of all the resources, books, and skills of handling literature that i have and have been taught, the most useful thing that i know when it comes to studying scripture is something that all believers have and that is the power of prayer.

when peter, the fisherman, wrote his letters that ended up in our bible, all he had was what he had been through and prayer. he was a simple and uneducated man, yet his works have lasted and will last until the end of time.

prayer is the key to unlock all the doors and gates to the scriptures. God is faithful to give to those who merely ask. ask for answers and He will be sure to give them to you. as christians, we have the Spirit of God in us who is wanting to reveal the secrets of God to you, but He is simple waiting for you to ask Him to reveal it to you.

pray and ask, God is good, He will give it

light of the world

matthew 5:14-16 has been on my mind for about 3 weeks now, and i have finally decided to write something about it.

"you are the light of the world. a city set on a hill cannot be hidden; nor does anyone light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on the lamp-stand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven."

this is speaking to christian. if you claim Christ, this should be you.
light is the one of the things in this world that we can not live without. we need light of some sort, preferably sunlight. there is very little that we can do with no light, sleep and breathing are about the only things that we could excel at in absolute darkness. in plainness, we need light.
as christians, we are that light. we should be helpers, teachers, counselors, preachers, workers, instructors, and friends in everything that we do. lights are useful and in the same way, we should be too. we should be the people that everyone wants to do the work because we do it right and fast. we should be the ones that people call for help, not oprah or dr. phil.
a light in a dark room can not be ignored, so we too should be the same way. this does not mean that we are obnoxious but bright. we should have attention on us. if people want light, they will gather towards us, and if they strive to be in darkness they will shun us, but either way, we should be noticed and a response should have to be made, we should not, and can not blend in to the crowd. there is one time that we are to be obnoxious though, and that is when we are so bright in the current situation, that all others not of the light will have to shield their eyes from you and push you away. this can happen in two situation: either the light is so bright or the darkness is so thick, either way people will not like the light.
if you are not liked though, that is ok. for as the light goes forth and pierces the darkness, it can and should cause sparks, which God can then make into a new flame, which is all the more glorious. when hit with a spark, it hurts, people don't like it. but when that spark starts a fire, it doesn't hurt but makes more of itself (that kinda breaks down but that is ok, cuz fire actually does hurt, but whatever, figure out what i'm trying to say). when a new fire is started, it not longer cares but getting hit by the spark but does in fact, love it and will love the light. this is what we want, more fire.
fire is sustained by fuel, this fuel is the Word and prayer (among other things such as fellowship, etc. ). so if our fuel is the Word and prayer, then should be reading all we can and then praying about it as much as we can. this things go together and make us better.
i have more on this but it is now time for work
go forth and be bright lights. examine your lives to see if there is anything that Christ is revealing to you that will make you even brighter lights.

and the time of death?

the title of this has little reference to the actual content of this post, except for the fact that it has the words "time" and "death" in it.
so, first on time after death. since we know that God is outside of time and that time was in fact made for it's usefulness to man, i believe that when we die, it will instantly be the end time because we will then be outside of time as well. there will be no more day or night. so while time may in fact pass, it won't matter to us, it will all be the same. i have no real solid scripture for this, it's just a thought at the moment to me.
but with that, i am excited to die, not only because it means the end of this life, but mostly because it is the beginning of the next life. i am excited for the second coming and to see Christ fully glorified to the upmost. He will finally display all His glory for all man to see, believers and unbelievers and we will all bow the knee and worship Him, which will be a great and marvelous day. the sad part is that some will then be sentence to eternity in hell. which since there is not day or night for the time pieces that God had set up at the beginning are done away with, eternity will seem like one day and that day will last forever. that forever though will be either in agony or in utter rejoicing and praise to God. i look forward to singing with a good voice and learning for all of eternity about the character of God. i pity those who have not been elected to have God's pleasure bestowed upon them. however, with that, since we don't know who it is that is elect, we should be evangelizing to all of those that are around us. for if we know of the gift or curse that will coming in the end, we should be excited about it and telling everyone and wishing no one to hell for lack of telling. we should not be selfish enough to keep the glory of God to ourselves because we are afraid of what men might think. men are stupid, in generally, and it doesn't matter what they think, only God and eternity matters. we have a mere 80ish years on the earth to do what it is that we are going to do, and in that time, what we do will effect all of our eternity. don't think that you get 80 years, think and live like you will get only one more minute, and at the end of your 80 years, you will be proud of how you have lived them, never regretting but glad of how you spent them.
go out and live, for tomorrow we die :)

it's a bird, it's a plane, no, it's superman

as a young male, i simple love to watch a good super hero movie with some cool effects and stuff in it. i love the idea of a person fighting for what they believe in, the greater good, and using their super powers to do it. i am enthralled by it, it excites me. why do young people like it though? why do we like to sit and watch other "people" do amazing things when we know it can't happen and that we ourselves will never be able to do anything like it? it is, i believe, the little man syndrome but not the one that we normal think.
the normal little man syndrome is that a small person get big toys, basically. this one though is that a little person, i.e. a human, looks to "big people" i.e. super heroes, instead of the original big person. we all love to be friends with the biggest guy cuz we then have protection from everything, or at least everything that is smaller then the person. we long for this and we need it. we like to feel protected. we like to watch people with god-like powers because we like to feel protected or important or powerful.
God was, and is, and is to be the first and only big person. we are like this in our nature because God made us this way in order that we would be in awe of Him. we love to watch super powers because we love to be amazed. God has ever super power and more, He has all power, yet so few tend to look to Him. we might say because we can't see His power, but just watch a sun rise and you see His power in moving the sun into the correct position of the sky, providing light for us, and making it all beautiful to our eyes, all at the same time. He could have simple made light, like He did the first day, and not have given us all the beauty to go along with it. God is good though and He wants to do those things for us, so that we have even more reasons and reminders to praise Him for it. we are under and can be best friends with the God we created the world in a word, flooded the world with a word, clothed the lily in it's beauty, and who saved us from our depravity. we should be looking to Him all the more and forgetting about the people who have only imaginary powers. look to the one who has all power.

the mind of a child

i went to the beach today and while sitting there in the sun, i was listening to some of the kids play around me. it was interesting to me to hear the things that these kids cared about, nothing really out of the ordinary, just the basic things but things that just don't really matter. this then caused me to compare it to an old person who is on their death bed, and the only likely and probably things that they would think on would be death and what would happen after death and the things of life after death.
so, why the change? how do we go from simple having fun to thinking only of the things of the next world? while i may only be 19, it seems to me that the closer we get to death or the time that is suspected for death to come, the more we tend to think on it. no baby thinks of death, but a 110 year old person should have it constantly on their mind.
while this may be the norm, what if it wasn't? the old are always saying how they wished they would have lived while the young are always saying how they are going to live but what if the old lived how they had wished while the young would live as they plan. much more would be accomplished if the youth embraced their youth and if the old would train to youth how to do it.
i am a 19 year old who shook hands with death then turned and came back. i would say that i am one of the few youths who are living as the elder because i now feel like the elder. with this though, even though i have made mistakes that i already regret, i now can live the life that i would have wanted to live if i had lived to an old age. the youth must start to act old when they are young so that when they are old they will then have a life that they can be proud to have. we must live the lives that we plan and not just simple plan them.

blessed? or cursed?

while listening to the New Testament today at work, i heard the passage of Matthew 6:25-34 which talks about how God cares for His own. hearing this made me think back on something that i have been thinking on for the last couple of days, which is that what ever God gives to us, whether bad or good, is really for our best. even thinking of myself and my ailments, they are all perfect for me, for the have made me grow so much and have also helped me in deciding what i think God what me to do with my life. it is interesting though how if i tell a nonbeliever about my life, they instantly say, "oh, i'm sorry" while i have to quickly reply, "why? im not." the world can not make sense of people who are calm and joyful in the face of a difficult situation. it doesn't make sense to them.
also, thinking upon this more also brought to mind David in the Old Testament. in 2 Samuel 24:10-14 david got into trouble and he is faced with a choice of three punishments, one from nature, one from man, and one from God. David choose to be punished by God because he would rather put himself into the hands of a merciful God rather then into any of situation. now if david could trust God in punishment, shouldn't we also trust Him in everyday life? the answer is yes, for we do serve a merciful, loving God who wants the best for us. this does not mean that we get what we want because what we want is not generally what is best for us. we must learn to submit, wait, trust, and then to see the fruition of God's blessings, for even a "curse" can turn out to be a blessing.
a 17 year old athlete dying would seem like a curse, but a year later, no one who was effected by the boys death and resurrection would change what had happened, because we can now see that through this "curse" huge blessings came from it, whether it be learning to trust God, learning what to do with one's life, or anything else that someone else might have experience through it all. our God is good, we must learn to fully believe that, and trust that our good God will bring about good for us.

duality of man

when created and put on this earth, God put into man passions that drove men to better this life. we are people of duality, having multiply passions and interests. this is perfect, for God created us this way, but only when our supreme passion is that of Christ. all other things will fall and burn, yet Christ has defeated death already, He will not fail.
with these passions, there must be a balance, with the balance tipped towards God. how are we to accomplish this if the things of this world are ever pressing, to the point that we forget the God who is ever present. a correct view of God will help us, as well as putting things that we would trip and fall over that will remind us of our great God. the greatest help to us though it prayer, for that one thing helps to strengthen us and allows us to commune with God, with no need of a priest. this is the best of blessings, to be able to call on God.

of God's faithfulness

perhaps the most obvious example of how faithful God is shown through life in general. for if God ever were to not be faithful, even for a second, all would cease to exist for God is the one to hold it all together.
it is also shown more fully, however through His faithfulness to remember and fulfill all of His promises and prophesies. He is the only one who has never failed and will never fail because He tells us that He will never fail. all other beings and religions have fallen at some point, but God is perfectly faithful and has not lied yet.
He is faithful

make war

man's man

well, i just finished watching the disney movie "tarzan" and while this is a completely vile movie because it is laced with the evolutionary hypothesis (thanks leila) which is slowly conveyed to the children who watch the movie in a way that they love, tarzan is a man's man. he kills a leopard with a spear, which i can safely say that i will never do, and can tree surf which is pretty cool.

while watching this, i actually got sick to my stomach and had to fight tears because i wanted to be like that to my future family (if God wills). looking into tarzan's actions further though, it is not so much that he can do all that stuff that is amazing, but the fact that he is willing to try. it is not the fact that he can kill the leopard, but that he is willing to try to fight it in order to save those that he loves. while i can never even run after a guy, one thing that i am willing to do is to die for someone i care for. i know for sure that if given a choice, i would gladly give up my life for just about anyone for the simple fact that 1) i know where i am going when i die 2) that place that i am going is going to be amazing 3) i would rather leave this life then to have someone else leave it who is perhaps not ready to die or who may enjoy this life more then i would enjoy it or the fact that i could perhaps not stand to live without that person (such as my unknown future wife or current family) 4) perhaps my sacrifice could bring about the one who i saved salvation which would be worthy of dying 1000 times or more in order to save that one soul (though it is really Christ through Scripture that saves).

so, while i may not be a worldly man's man because i can do actually very little, i hope that i can say and that it can be said of me that i am a God's man, for that is all that really matters to me and all that really actually matters.

life isn't worth living if you don't have something higher to live for

check this guy out

this guy is amazing at piano, look him up and listen to all of his other stuff

Of Sin

looking upon my own thoughts and desires when i sin, i perceive that there can only be 3 reasons why people sin, and only 2 that can relate to me. 

first, the one that doesn't pertain to me. people sin when they do not know that there is a God or when they don't know the real God. if they do not know who they sin against, there is no possible way that they can uphold the law that this one that they sin against has put into order, so they must, therefore, sin. they have no real hope or choice. with this sin, comes death. so, this is a call to evangelize, for in order for people to stop sinning, they must know what it is that they are doing wrong. once they hear the Word though, they then have a choice, which leads me to my next two points.

let us say that once the person has heard the Word, that they believe. great, awesome, wonderful. now that they have a new found love for God, they will seek to know more about Him and to grow in Him and to be like Him, which wound mean that they are not sinning. but wait, aren't there any Christians today who would profess these very things? yes, there are. then how is there still sin if they are living like Christ? well, i can only see one thing for that, and it would be that in the moment of sin, the Christian, somehow, forgets about the God that has saved him and that he now serves and in that moment, he indulges himself rather then living for his great God. a Christian who is living for Christ can only sin when he forgets that he is living for Christ, for if he were living for Christ and had that on his mind, he would not sin. while it is a great sin to even forget about our God,  i fear that the last reason is far worst, and possible more prevalent in our culture. this reason however has two perspectives to it:

the first is perhaps the most common of any of them and that is that people hear the Word, and simple reject it complete. they live their lives in absolute rebellion to that of God's Word and in the end, they will be judged for this. this is incredibly sad to see though it is ever spreading to cover this earth in this belief, that people can choose the way to heaven that they want, however, the path is narrow to heaven, with many people falling away, thinking that they are going down the correct path when, in fact, they are going towards hell and the lake of fire and eternal punishment. while this scenario is terrible, the last one is much more grievous.

the last reason that man can sin is linking to the one before, but it is with a Christian rather then a nonbeliever. when temptation comes to a believer, and they then pause and think about this sin that has come to them, and scripture and prayer both come to mind, but it is not heart felt and instead of following what they know to be true in their heart, they follow what their body is telling them and they indulge in this temptation. this can only happen when a believer doesn't care that there is a God and that this God is watching them and what they are doing at this moment. this is a terrible grievous sin. it is like going up to Christ, while He is waiting to be nailed to the cross, and you taking the hammer and nail, and smiling to Him saying, "i'm doing this to you so that i may live how i like and not have to pay the price for it but to rather have you pay it for me." this is arrogant and shameful. we are not to sin so that grace may abound (Rom. 6:1-4) but we are to live like Christ did, a perfect life, so that we may show Him off in this world. we are not to indulge ourselves, but to indulge in Christ alone, for He is where our hope is found. 

if you examine your life to see why you are sinning, i believe that all those times will boil down to one of these reasons. if they do, i pray that you will repent and pray to God to help you in that area so that you may live like Him. life is short, and then you die. live this life as if it is all that matters, not is if it doesn't. live for Christ, for He really is all that matters.

absent

i know it has been awhile since i have posted but i was sick, then i was in europe for 2 weeks, then being jet-lagged, and then with my busy schedule at the moment, i haven't had time to blog, though i hope to start to blog every night soon, probably in about a week or so, for then my schedule is will be much more loose.

youth is wasted on the youth

this is an old phrase that could not be more true. first, the time of youth is the time when one has the most free time and the most energy. children seem to always be going 100 mph but with no real direction; which is the problem. so much force with no purpose is not really force at all buy really just spent energy. this lack of direction comes from lack of thought.

not, when the youth begins to grow-up, they start to loss energy and with this loss of energy, they learn to think more. the more they think, the "better" a person they become (if they have right thinking). so now that this person is better, they now do not have the energy to carry out their new compassion's and heart desires as they would have been able to when they were young. if the youth had the mind of the old and the energy of the young, this world would be a better place. we must work to teach the youth to be like the old so that great things may be done. if this happens, then youth would not be wasted on the youth, but spent to it's fullest. this fullness would only be possible if it is totally spent of Christ.

inadequate

in general, people never stop talking. they are always telling something to someone about something that happened somewhere. yet in all that talking, there is little substance, in general, and if there is substance, is it really good? 

the most eloquent of writers and speakers could relate the most beautiful of messages about our great God, yet they would not come close to touching the magnitude of His great glory. they could spin the best of lines in such a way so as to stun an audience, yet it would shine as dimly as a candle compared to the sun. there is nothing that man can do or say that could ever possible hope to communicate the vastness of the power of our magnificent God.

so the next question would be, why do any of it? why talk about Him, why write about Him, why praise Him? because we are commanded to, for if we don't, the very rocks will cry out with the praises of our King. we can do Him no justice, yet we will spend all eternity trying to, and we will love doing that, and love Him for allowing us to, and in return, He will love us for He created us. oh that we have a merciful and gracious Redeemer that care for what He created, or else we would be little more then dust and ashes. glory be to God

faithful servant

matthew 25:29, to those that God has given to, more shall be given if they are faithful to multiply what they already have, however, if you do nothing with what you have or dare i say squander it, then all shall be taken from you. this is a good promise to remember, cuz even if you don't have a whole lot of ability or whatever, if you use what you have, God will bless it and use it and then give you even more. though it is also a warning in that if you do not use what God has given you and do not invest time in to work and study, then you will mess up your life and God will not work things to bless you, though He may still use you to bless others and such, though you may not get the blessings from it as you would have if you would have worked for Christ instead of something else. 

all is profitable

in numbers 26 there is a census listed. now generally, these tend to be quite boring to read yet if you look at them as something that could lead someone to Christ, then that makes them kinda cool. to think that someone could be lead to a saving faith in Christ by the simple listing of people in the bible that all points to the birth of Christ, that is cool.

so remember that even when it could seem like they are boring, all scripture is profitable, or else God wouldn't have written in all down. so read it

be ready

matthew 24:42-51 talks about how we are to be ready for when Christ will return. we must be living our lives now how we think we ought to when Christ comes back for we do not know when He will return so we should live as if He is returning now. 

would you live your life the way that you are now if Christ were to come this very night? if yes, then either good job, or i'm sorry that you are going to hell. for either you are living for Christ as you should, or you don't care for Christ and will burn in hell forever.

now, if you are not living your life as you should be and you know it, then change. i know this is not as simple as it is to say, but we still must do it. we've got to. we are called to this. 

go out and bear fruit and multiple the kingdom

authority

our current postmodern age is one that hates all authority and would rather do without any of it. it would rather have everyone make up their own standard so that everyone can do what ever it is that they want to do. as a person of the Word, we are to be people of authority. this is actually to pastors. pastors are to teach with authority, similarly to what Christ did, though slightly different. Christ preached with His own authority, while we are to teach with his authority and not our own. we get our authority from Christ. with this authority, we must know what we are teaching and the only way to know that is to study the Word. so we must study to Word to know what it says so that we may teach with the authority of Christ. we can do nothing until we know what the Scriptures says and if we don't know, then we should say that and then get help so that we can know what it says so that we can have the authority of Christ so that we may teach those that are under us. this is no small matter. Christ condemns the scribes for this for they taught with no authority but would rather make the text of scripture say what ever it is that they wanted it to say. this is terribly wrong. however, i am sure that no one who is going to read this would dare make stuff up with scripture, so i won't say any more on this :)

study the Word, everyone, so that even if you are not teaching, you may know if the teacher is actually teaching the right stuff. teachers, study and then teach. you have a holy occupation that is of the greatest of importance and it should not be taken lightly.

steak and potatoes

while this meal is generally referred to the heartiest of meals, what i am getting this week is better. it is just plain awesome. while this week is awesome though, what happens when i get back home? how am i going to be getting fed then? well, you might say church, but i think that you are wrong. to keep with food, church should be the coffee at the end of the meal and not the meal itself. we should all be eating throughout the week, eating good, heavy meals so that when sunday and church comes along, it is not our only meal, but our way to enjoy the meal better.

have you ever had a couple of cups of coffee after you eat a big meal? guess what it does to you? a couple of things:

first, it compliments the food. it doesn't really fill you up any more, though it does make the rest of the meal taste better. it you go to church on sunday after a good week of bible study, reading and prayer, church is just an enforcement and encouragement to your walk, something to inspire confidence as you become more like Christ.

second, coffee helps to start digestion. when you eat a big meal, your stomach kinda starts to hurt and such cuz there is so much food in there and it just isn't made to handle it all that well, coffee helps to generate some stomach acids to help with that. church is the same way, it should help us to understand scriptures all the more so that during our own time of study, we will be able to better understand what we are wrestling with, it promotes bible study.

and lastly, coffee helps to energize. after a meal, your body sends all the blood to the stomach to help with digestion, this causes some sleepiness in the person, turkey coma is a common term around thanksgiving. coffee helps with this with it's great amounts of good caffeine. this is the fellowship part of church. while we may have a hard week with work or the family or kids or school or whatever, church will be there at the end of the week to help encourage and excite you for the week to come, even though it may be the same and you know it to be the same. this came, however, only come if you are studying the word and that it is active in you. this one only comes if the other two are present. a believer who is in the word should love church and be excited to go to church and should leave even more excited and encouraged and more ready to go out in to the world and show off Christ all the more after church. 

so go out and eat some good meals and then go and get the coffee, it is the way that it is meant to be and it works oh so much better cuz coffee doesn't do well on an empty stomach, it will eventually erode the stomach lining which isn't very pleasant. this might not happen with church, but it doesn't actually with coffee.

day 1

well, after finishing the first day at shepherd's conference, i would have to say that it is an awesome experience that everyone should get to have at some point and to some extent in their lives. people talk a lot about the singing, the the teaching is what is really impacting me. in this, i shall try and convey some of the things that i have learned today.

session one, taught by john macarthur was called, "why every calvinist must be a 6 day creationist" his reasoning is because it is clearly in the bible in genesis 1, so just read it and it makes perfect sense. also, that we must not be enviromentalist. so, "step on grass, kill and deer, and drill for oil, now". that is actually what he said in the message. he did not stress to much about being stewards of the earth, but i think that is because we are already way to concerned about that to the point that it is hurting human life, so he didn't stress it to much, though he did mention it a little.

the next one was about how to preach the Old Testament, and that mostly just went over basic bible study techniques that are forgotten and overlooked when studying the Old Testament.

the next one was about how the church is the epicenter for our christianity. we must build the church on the correct foundation and the only way to do that is to know what that foundation is and the only way to know that is to study the Word day in and day out. we must know the truth so that we can teach it to others. there is no excuse. we need to build the church as if we are building God's temple, because the church is God's temple. each believer is where the Holy Spirit is so that is God's temple. this is no small task but one that should be taken with all seriousness. the end result of this life is all the same, everyone will the bowing down to God, praising and worshipping Him, the only difference is where we will be when we are doing this. this life is on loan from God, should we not be doing what we will be doing after our death for the rest of eternity, which is praising God? so start doing what you should be doing so that we may bring God all the more glory.

the last session was again by john macarthur and it was mostly about his life and what his thoughts about the church are. all of his thoughts about the church though come from the bible, from scripture. there are things in this life that he will not budge on, in his life and in his church. we must make up our list of things that we will not change no matter what. the thing is, that this list should not change at any point in our life. it should be the same through out, for it should all be from scripture, and since scripture doesn't change, neither should our list. so make a list from scripture and follow it.

stumbling child or falling brother

well, we arrived in california today safely. it was a good trip down though quite long. during the ride, i was thinking about sin and how it grieves God. to get it so that my mind could comprehend, i dumbed it way down. i compared actually sin with the analogy of a child and brother. if a baby were to walk up to me, not knowing any better, and punched me, it wouldn't really bother me at all that he did that. however, if a brother were to come up and to do the same to me, i would be hurt and annoyed by what he did. this is not because what the brother did to me hurt more but because he did it knowing full well what he was doing. he was not ignorant and innocent like the baby. 

how does this relate? well, a pagan sins because he doesn't know any better, while when the believer sins, it is completely against what God tells him not to do and he knows better then to do it. he is, in fact, hurting him Father, which is something that we should not want to do.

so, stop grieving the Father. strive to live for Him. 

friends

john 15:15 "no longer do I call you slaves, for a slave does not know what his master is doing, but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from My Father I have made known to you."

this verse is a great comfort in that we now know what we are to do and that it is in fact what we are to do. Christ has revealed to us through Scriptures all that we are to do. all that the Father has told Christ He has told us, and since Christ and the Father are one (jn 10:30) then Christ knows all that the Father knows so He has in fact revealed to us all things. this does not mean that we can comprehend everything or that we have the capacity to know everything, but simply that all is revealed. so the more that we study Scriptures, the more we can learn, know, and apply but this can only come through the study of Scriptures for Christ reveals Himself to the believers today through Scripture. 

the term "friend" also denotes closeness. we are not just mindless slaves as we once were to sin but we now have a relationship to Christ as a brother, companion, friends, leader, shepherd and mediator. He is the high priest who can sympathizes with us for He knows all that we have gone through for He has gone through it all as well. He has gone through the worst of things in life, suffered the most horrible of deaths, and was tempted in all manners without falling. He is the perfect friend to have, for He gives perfect advise for He has already gone through this life without fall. advise is best when coming from an informed source and what source is better informed then that of the source that created everything. 

(i  know i missed a few post which was dues to no internet. i won't be making those up though cuz i'm a little busy and tired and still kinda sick right now.)

baal

although the name is no longer around, baal is still prevalent in the world today. people always go to someone or something to help them in their time of need and spend their time with who or what it is and yet it does not work. only by depending on the one true God can anything happen and work out. God will take care of us, for we are more important then the sparrows. God took care of elijah by bringing him food and protecting him from the people of the land and because of his faith in God, God also blessed a poor widow and her son because of the faith shown by elijah.

            application: who knows, God could use anyone like elijah to bless those around us if we are willing to follow Him without question. we must be ready to follow Him though and we must know where we are to go. the only way to know that is to study the Word of God diligently and apply it to our lives. i would like to implement more personal bible study time into my life and i plan on doing this probably starting next week. i am going to start to go through the book of john, looking to learn more about the life of Christ and the person of the Son of God. after or during if I find that time to short, i am going to study ephesians and then probably work through all of the epistles because i like them a lot and they are very applicable, especially for young Christians.

since the creation on the world

since the beginning, God has revealed attributes of Himself through creation. man has done a wonderful job of taking those attributes and worshipping them as gods through out all of history. whether it be the early pagan cultures and their gods or even right now with environmentalist and the like. they all worship the creation instead of the creator. should we not focus on the entity that created the substance rather then focus on the substance? yes, we should. romans 1 talks about the fact that nature reveals aspect of God, so we should look at nature to see God more clearly and to get to know Him better, but nature is not our only focus. scriptures should be our main focus. observations of the world around us will make us love God all the more, but only if we have a right focus on it. a focus that is on God.

grace academy

tonight i helped out with the preview dessert for our school. i would have to say that i totally love my school. there isn't a school that i would rather be at. tonight i got the opportunity to help take a couple of parents on a tour of the school and now looking about on that, i would say that i should have said more, because i really do go to a great school. it is a small school, which is something that i love cuz i basically know everyone in my high school and all the teachers. the classes are generally challenging enough to hold my attention while exciting enough to catch interest. the faculty and staff genuinely care about the students that go there, often giving time to help out and advise students. 

there are plenty other of things that i could say, but i am still kinda sick so i'm going to go to bed now.

the mind is a terrible thing to lose

i had a migraine today and i still haven't quite gotten my mind back completely from it. everything is still a little fuzzy, especially in the whole thinking area. i can't quite focus on anything. kinda sad. oh well though. i got to have a nice relaxing day of sleeping basically all day cuz i couldn't really do anything else. i am hoping to be totally better tomorrow so that i can actually check up on some work that i missed today, but if not, then i am still going to have to check up on the work, it will just take me much longer. 

well, i need to sleep now

theologians

we had some baptism tonight at church and those combined with the songs that we sang got me thinking about all that Jesus does for us. just looking at my own life and how i was before i was saved. the thoughts that i had were completely revolting and yet God chose me and saved me from myself and my sins. i did nothing so there is nothing that i can brag about or show off except for Christ. Christ is the only thing in the world worth showing off and the best way to show Him off is to be more like Him, so that is what we are to strive for, to be more like Christ. the only way to be more like Christ is to get to know Him better, for it is hard to be like something or someone when you know nothing about it, and the only way to really get to know Him is through His Word, so we should be reading more and more with each passing day. we should all be theologians to some degree or another for we should all be working on getting to know Christ and God more.

snow

today i went snowboarding and i would say that the weather was absolutely great and it was beautiful up there. there were clear skies most of the day and the sun was shining bright. it was great. it is amazing to see what God can do with some water and light. it was just great up there. none other can do what He does, which is why he is God and Lord and not someone else. He can do whatever He wants, that is the great thing, cuz what He wants never changes. we have an eternal God who is a rock, never changing.

rally the youth

though the youth of this nation may have little say of things today, tomorrow they will be the voice of the people. so, what will that voice say? the voice will say what it has been taught, what it has seen, and what it have heard. so are the youth under a good influence that will eventually influence this world for the better? looking at my own life, i know that if God had not saved me, i would be in a very sorry state to help this country and world. i would not be the kind of person that people would look up to but one breed of the flesh and driven by the flesh. only through the saving grace of Christ has my life gotten any better, and though my health continues to "change" i am still in a better place then i was back when i was healthy; for though i am sick in this life, i am cured for my disease for the life to come. i am no longer infected by this body of flesh, though it does flare up at times, but i am a child of the most high God, the One who is greatly to be praised. 

with out Christ, i would be a mess, as any one would be with out Christ. so we must try to save this world from the infectious disease of the flesh. we are so eager to help those who have health problems with money and support, but why can't we, or why don't we try to help their real need. we must be the vaccine of this world, we are the white blood cells and antibodies that God uses to cure the body. the antibodies though must be in good health themselves, or else they can't fight off disease for they are diseased and out of order themselves. so learn what you believe, and then go and and tell people, tell the whole world. infect this world with and new disease, the disease of Christ.

singularly addicted to the word of God

for those of you who know me, you should know that i really enjoy reading, especially books about the reformers and puritans. william tyndale was a man who was said to be singularly addicted to the word of God, so much so that he was eventually hung and then burned for his beliefs. now that is wicked awesome, not to be burned but to have people say that you are singularly addicted to God's word. i would love for my life to be summed up like that. tyndale was the first to translate the whole bible into english. he has actually finished the first 5 books, and on his way to england, i believe, he was shipwrecked and lost all of his work. so he simply started over again. that is called dedication and addiction. i like that, i respect that. 

now, how many of you who are reading this could say that you are addicted to scripture? i know  that i couldn't say that, at least not yet. but this is something to shoot for, to be so in love with God and His word that you spend all your time thinking and pondering and reading what it says, that would be a good thing to shoot for in your life. it is hard to sin when you are thinking about God and all that He does, for you and for everyone and everything. so love God, spend time getting to know Him, and He will make your path straight.

done

unfortunately, i am now done with my message for one 28, so it is now back to "normal" life for me, which i am going to kinda miss studying. so, to fix that, i am going to start to write a commentary on the book of john some time in the next couple of weeks. i may wait until after shepherd's conference in the hopes of getting a different commentary on john to compare mine to. i am looking forward to getting some normal hours of sleep though, i am kinda tired. i will try to pick up my other reading again too, i haven't read to much lately cuz i have been kinda busy, so i need to pick that back up again as well. there are to many good books out there to not be reading all the time, so that is something i am going to try and catch up on.  

well, i am very tired now, so i am going to bed now

bug to a light

earlier tonight i was reading "mortification of sin" by john owen and a new thought about mortification came to me from the book. it is that the first action in mortification is not turning from sin, but turning towards God. if we first turn to God, turning from sin will be a natural action and work of the Holy Spirit in us. the closer we are to God, the less we will sin and the more our mortification is complete. 

it is like walking towards a giant light, like the sun. when we first turn towards it, we cast a huge shadow, but the closer we get to the light, the less of a shadow we cast until eventually, we are one with the light and cast no shadow for the light envelopes us. 

God is the light while the shadow is the sin the still holds some hold over us. 

we should pursue the light like a bug does, flying towards it out of shock and awe of it, going towards it out of obsession; though instead of meeting our death at the light, we meet our life, God and Christ Jesus and oh what a wonderful day that will be when we finally do meet Them. 

the blood of bulls and goats

i started to read leviticus tonight and it was shocking to read of all the animals that had to be sacrificed for the israelites sins. blood would have to be a normal thing for those people back then. reading about those sacrifices and then looking to our sacrifice, it is all the worst. our sacrifice is more removed so it is not in our minds as much when we sin, for if it were, i think that we would not sin as flippantly as we do now. it is still our sin that hangs Christ to the cross though, we are the ones who are beating Him, pounding the nails into His hands and feet, killing Him. our stomachs should churn and feel nauseated over our own sin, yet we feel fine about, even revel in it.

we should be broken and feel broken

filthiness

in the first verses of psalm 38, david is talking about his own sin. david has a pretty good view of his own sin. if we see our sin, it should make us sick. yet we still revel in it. how can a man do that? they shouldn't, that is for sure, and yet we all do it. we all return back to our vomit and sins. we need reform. we need to see sin for what it is and to life a live for Christ instead of our several

other more worldly interest that simple seem to distract us from Christ.

forsake our sinful lives and turn to Christ

rest

after a week that seemed like 3 weeks, i was very glad to get some rest today. i actually probably was up for enough hours this week to equal that of how many hours i stay up in a normal 3 weeks. so i was a little tired and needed some rest, which was nice. the only "work" that i did today was that i washed my car, which this was actually the first time i have ever washed my car since i have had it, so for about a year. i had no clue that the wheels were silver, i thought that they were black. 

as much as i like rest though, i don't do well without a schedule. i just don't get anything done. but it doesn't happen that often, so oh well. 

i tired now, so i am going to bed

jimminey cricket

in acts 24, paul is speaking to felix the governor. felix soon becomes convicted and sends paul away. 

now, while we may not be able to send people away, often times we simply tune out the source of our conviction. conviction is good though, it is what shows us our sins and is what tells us what is right. it is our little cricket, hence the title. as people who enjoy the things of this world to often, i believe that we dismiss our conviction and may even be encouraged to dismiss them because they aren't "relative" to us. that's crap. there is one law, one way, and one truth, and we must follow that one way. 

stop living your life for yourself and live for something that is better. live for Christ; live for God and He will make life worth living. the world will seem empty until we turn to the one and only thing that can fill us, which is Christ. 

this is not a partial turn though, this must be a full turn. our entire self must be turn towards and running to Christ. He deserves all of our love, passion, actions, and desires. He is worth it too.

rest

reading in exodus  34 tonight, it talks about how the people of israel would not work on the sabbath, even during harvest time. while the church today doesn't observe the sabbath, but only the idea of the sabbath, i find myself at times not really even doing that. i often save my home work to do on sunday and i will stay up late sunday night and such, while one of the reasons for the idea of the sabbath is to give a day of rest. so, i am going to try and do my home work earlier so that i can rest on sunday. now resting on sunday does not constitute watching tv and sleeping all day, but i think of it as a time to read the bible and other books while spending the day in thought about and prayer to God.

slow down

one of the things that i love to do is to drive fast. i love to accelerate fast, turn fast, and stop fast. whatever it is in a car, i like to do fast. no, i have thinking about this and was convicted on something. speed limits - they were put into place by the government, which means we are to obey them. obeying them doesn't mean that we do what we don't get caught for, but what is posted. so, driving 40 in a 35 because the cops won't pull you over is still wrong. it is still breaking the law, and sorry that they give us some grace and not pull everyone over who is not going exactly the speed limit, maybe they should crack down and go to within 1 mph of the speed limit to get a ticket. God has raised up governments and we, as christians, should follow them and if they say that we can only do a certain speed on a road, then that is what we are to do to the best of our abilities. this will be something that i struggle with, so i will have to go really fast and then stop accelerating right before i get to the speed limit so that i don't go over but i am going to try and do the speed limit, even though i will get tailgated the whole time.

protected by God

today kim got rear-ended on her way to garrett's bball game. everyone who was in the car is fine, so that is great. it is great to see who God protected them too. the car that hit her and the car that hit the guy who hit her are in really bad shape, yet kim's car had nothing wrong with it as far as we could tell. no damage what so ever, no even scratched paint. that is an awesome thing. i am glad that my sister is alright, but it is even more great to see who caring our God is through this whole thing. we have a Great Protector who wants the best for us. it is an awesome and humbling thing, to know that we have no control, but also that we have a sovereign God who is in control and who loves His children.

glory be to God

the glory of God as seen through the human body

today, i had a research paper due, so of course, i did it all last night. something really cool though, is that i have never been more awake and more alert at 2 in the morning as i was last night. when i finally finished at  2:30, i got into bed and i wasn't tired but actually sat in bed for a bit waiting to fall asleep. i am never like that, i can generally fall asleep in a matter in minutes no matter what. it was a great thing to see that i could be awake at that time. 

from that, i believe that it was only because of God that i could have been as awake as i was because He gave me an interest in the topic that i was doing (the importance of personal bible study as seen through the lives of edwards, luther, and tyndale) and then from that desire, that ability for the body to do things that it normally couldn't do because of excitement and the such. i was shocked by it all last night.

we serve a great and awesome God

pray

being a christian is all about being like Christ. while, i believe, most christians understand this, i know that i have been missing a huge part of it and i am sure other people have too, which is why i am choosing to post this. i totally get the whole sanctification part, doesn't mean i do it correctly, but yeah, but the huge part that i have been missing is the relationship part, mostly in the form of prayer. i hardly ever just talk with God. i have been working on praising Him more, but i still need to just spend time communing with Him. even if someone were to live a perfect life, they would not be Christ-like unless they prayed continually with the Father, for that is something that Christ did. we must have a relationship which means that communication goes both ways.

show your emotions

while it is not desirable to be controlled by emotions, it seems to me that in the means to not be controlled we forsake our emotions completely, or at least silence the ones that really matter. for how can a man, saved from the wretchedness of his sins, not cry out to the whole world what his great God has done for him? i see none of this. now imagine, if all those who are saved start to go out and share this great thing that has happened to us, how would the world react? i can not say for certain, but they would have to make some choice and the more that they must make this choice, the more likely that they will choose the right choice. now, this choice is that of salvation. we must and should be acting like it is all up to us, but still remember that it is truly up to God. for if we act like it is up to us, then we should be sharing the good news with everyone, like we should be. also, if we believe that it is truly up to God, then we can sleep well at night knowing that it is up to God and that we have done our best and that is it really the Spirit that does the work, through us. the key is through us, meaning that we are to be used and that little will happen without us. this is a battle and a battle is hard to win when the foot solders do nothing. so, get ready and go share the word, be used by God. fulfill our purpose. let the world see our God through us, let them see the change that has occurred in you by Him. show your love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness and self-control, for these are the workings of God in your life and they should make your life to shine in this dark world that we are all a part of.

children

while working with the kindergartners at grace i noticed that many of them have similar traits. looking back on myself, i noticed many of my flaws are in the generation to come. we must work to correct them now, when they are easiest to correct. someone who can think and reason with is much harder to conform then someone who is young. so, while they are still moldable, let us work the kids into godly men and women.

flesh

being tired, i find myself wanting to just relax and sit and watch tv so that i don't have to think for an allotted time. however, i find myself gaining nothing, not even relaxation from this vain indulgence and i am starting to wonder why i even give in to it. i am already watching less and less tv and such since SR, and i am glad of that, and i am even more glad that i am not really enjoying that which i am watching. i just have a hard time watching that which i will get no spiritual help out of and which will probably only make me sink back further from my sanctification.

something that i do need to do is to pray more. so, i am going to end this a pray, for there is much that needs prayer in my life now, so that is what i am going to do. for God is the only one that can make anything different, so shouldn't we bring our problems to Him.

grammatically incorrect

so, a friend of mine asked me today if i would please capitalize some of the words on my post, such as "i" or the beginning of sentences. i had to decline and reply "no" however. there is, in fact, a reason for my lack of punctuation. which i guess wasn't completely obvious, and i think that it should be obvious.

as well as i can remember, i have left every name and word uncapitalized except for those relating to Christ and God. i am not writing a paper or anything, so i do not need to capitalize and i believe that the only things that are worth capitalizing at all times are those things which are truly important, which rules out all things except the various names and persons of God.

hate me for this is you like, though my conscience is clear before God, but i don't really care if you do hate me :) in the nicest possible way of not caring.

we serve a great God who deserves all respect, and i shall do my best to give it to Him. if i can downplay all other things and raise Him up by the simple use of capitalization, then i will, for He is worth it all.

transformed by the renewing of your mind

romans 12:2 "and do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect."

"transformed" is a complete and utter change from what we once were, to what we are to be in Christ. once saved, we should be changed from our sinful flesh to be more like Christ with each passing day.

i have seen people who have claimed Christ and no change has occurred and i have seen people who have claimed Christ and it is a complete night and day comparison between what they were and what they are. it is great to see who people dramatically changed by Christ. their entire outlook on life can be altered in a matter of days or even hours with belief in Jesus Christ. it is a great thing to see.

however, it is incredibly sad to see people who claim Christ, and no change happens. eternity is no small matter, but something that should be considered with respect.

we are not of this world, so we should not look as if we are. we are to be different. so live different

alien and strangers

a friend of mine recently became saved and she and her siblings decided to tell their parents about their new found faith. the parents did not respond well and told them to recant, or they would be removed from all christian influences. from what i know, they did not recant and they still are going to be allowed to return to grace. all praise be to God for truly saving these people and for working through them. may they bless their parents and may the Lord work through them to save their parents.

it is all providence that God placed these kids into a christian school and that they were saved through it all. now God is working through them to get to their parents. it is so great to see our great God working in the lives of the people around us.

this story is true, and it should do one, or many, things to our lives. it should challenge us all to stand up to the people of this world and proclaim Christ all the more. for how can a new believer stand up to their parents while we who have been saved, for a while, can not even stand up to a stranger about our faith. shame on us. we should be all the more zealous by now with our time to grow in Christ.

pray that you may be convicted on your half-hearted evangelism so that you may have boldness as these new believers do. i see this even in my own life as i often fail to see opportunities to share the gospel as i should share it to the unbelievers around me. i pray that God will give me opportunities to share so that He might work through me and so that He may be shown off and gloried in. nothing to do with me, i just want to be used.

joy through trials

paul is one of the most influential people in the church to this day, yet even he wasn't exempt in suffering. on the contrary, he suffered greatly for the cross and the message of Christ. so, if Christ suffered, and paul suffered, peter, stephen, and many others who professed Christ in the early church, shouldn't we too be suffering in the world today? yes, we should. some may say that we are suffering in the world, but we really aren't. being made fun of for your belief isn't suffering. no, we are mere children compared to the men of the early church. we should be fully ready to died for Christ, yet we will barely give anything up for Him. how wrong is this? completely. if we know Christ, we should love Him and know Him well enough to tell other people and then we should go out and tell other people. we should not be lazy and scared of this world but go out and evangelize it.

skeletons in the closet

if we are alive in Christ, why do so many "christians" today hold on to the dead flesh that is cursing their spiritual life to stink and rot? we must let go of this world so that we may live for God and not be slaves to the sins of this world and of the flesh. we must forsake this world and the meager, banal pleasures that it has to offer and look to Christ for the true joy of heaven and worshiping Him for eternity. when we look to Christ, the things of this world go away and we receive true joy. that is what i would love for my life. so that i may live for Him and bring glory to His name.

vain

when i look at my life and see the vain things that i enjoy, i am grieved. i have wasted great portions of my life in the attempt to amuse myself. the very meaning of the word amuse is terrible. "a" means no, while "muse" means thinking. so basically, "no thinking" that is not a good thing and that is something that i don't want my life to be about. i need to make reforms so that i may live a life that i may be proud of when i am old. to see the things that typify my generation are not things that i want to be apart of my life. we are known for our laziness and our lack of seriousness, that is wrong, we should be the leaders and we are the leaders of the future and we should be working forward to that.

what He reveals

the bible is God's Holy word and the way that He communicates with us humans. through it, He reveals Himself, His character, and so forth. but how can a book hold all of what is about an infinite God? it can't. the bible is just what is written about God, never contradicting and always accurate and true. that doesn't mean that is all of what sums up God. through study of scripture, we get much of God, but also through life we get some, but i believe that we will be eternally learning more about the character of God is heaven. we can never know the full extent of God. how can infinite be fully known? He can't He is to great.

i glory in a God that i will never fully know for i will always have to depend upon Him, which is great.

God will have His glory

through out all of history, man has done vile and wicked things, as well as great and marvelous things, all the while though, God has worked so that all things point to Him. everything that happens result in revealing some of His character and attributes. from knowledge of Him, we can better praise and worship Him, for you must know about whatever you are praising. our praise must be informed or else it is ignorant praise. ignorant praise is still better then no praise, though would it be better to worship something if you know exact what and how it all came about? yes, it would be and is, so take time and learn about our great God so that you may have informed worship.

all glory and praise be to our sovereign God, who is magnificent and all praise belongs to Him

God is in control over all

knowing that God is sovereign should bring us great joy.

knowing that God is in total control of everyone and does all things to bring Him the upmost glory should encourage us in that everything we do, no matter the manner we do it, will be used to bring God glory. anything that man does, no matter how bad, will eventually bring god the glory. it is a great thing that we serve such a great awesome God.

however, just because everything will bring Him glory, doesn't mean that we can sin all that we want. sin still grieves Him, and if we sin unchecked, then we may not be saved, and if we are not saved, then God could be hardening us as vessels of wraith, fit only for destruction. that is a scary thought. 

so, live for God

strive to be like Christ

do your own work

while i love to read books by men of old and even some authors that are still alive, i really don't like to read commentaries. to me, it is like not doing the work to find out what the author is intending. with a commentary, you get the author's opinion of what the passage is saying. i find that there is great satisfaction in struggling with a passage to find out what is meant by it. it brings a closeness to God and an ownership of the passage itself. prayer, before, after and during study, a quiet place, an awake mind, and the want to know what the bible says are the things, that i believe, are needed for bible study. i am saying all this to Christians though. no matter how long you study and "pray", a non-believer will not make sense of what the scriptures are saying. they may interpret it correctly, though they will not truly be able to grasp what it is saying. only the Holy Spirit can reveal what scripture says, which is why prayer is needed. the only way to get and receive the Holy Spirit is through a saving faith in Christ Jesus, who came, lived, died, and rose again to conquer death. only through Christ sacrifice may we come to Christ.

by the grace of God

for some reason, in my mind, i like to go through things that could happen and think about how i would and should react, and if different, what i should do to change so that they are the same. in Acts 14, paul and barnabas go to iconium and preach. the people, hearing them, call them gods and try to offer sacrifices to them. paul and barnabas are completely beside them selves by this. they tear their clothes and cry out, NO, for we are men like you (paraphrase).

after reading that, i was thinking about what i should and would do if someone were to do something like that to me. which led my mind to the fact that people have said things to me about maturing in Christ and such, and it made me realize that i don't give enough to God. my first reaction should be, "it's all God and the work that He has done through me. i have done nothing except to do what God has laid on my heart to do." i wish i could say that i only do what God has laid on my heart but i still fail and fall miserable, way to often. i must work and hope that God moves in me to be more like His Son. for that is all there is in life. yes, i realize that there are other aspects in life that we must have, but truly, deep down, i believe that everything boils down to being more like Christ. it should be our chief concern

absent

this will be my last post for a week for i will be on a week long winter retreat with my youth ministry and there will be no internet. so, to get around that, i am going to write posts up there on paper, then when i get back, i will post them, in order, on to here. that is about the best that i can do with no internet 

coward

if asked, most people would not say that i am a coward. however, i was talking to someone recently and they showed me a spot in my life that needs reform and the only reason that i struggle with this is that i am a coward. 

i would say that i am not the most out going person, though if called upon, i can talk quite a bit, sometimes to much :) the problem is though, is that i often struggle with public prayer. i do not enjoy praying in front of people. i care to much what people think and i don't think enough about what God thinks. i can't pray that bad cuz people still sometimes ask me to pray, though i do not feel right about it. it just seems so fake to me. i don't think that i speak well, so i tend to get tongue tied and such and then i am incoherent so people don't even know what i am saying. also i never know what to say while i am praying. i just have a very hard time being personal with God when there are other people to hear me. 

the most stupid part about this whole thing is, is that i know that i am a moron for being like this. which really frustrates me. there is not anything much greater that God could have given us then to communicate directly with Him. we need no third party. yet i have trouble doing it. 

well, i got something to work on :)

KILL

i started to read the book "mortification of sin" by john owen today. i read the first two chapters and i would say that it is a great book so far. it has given me a few new views on sin and the struggle to kill it. i have never really noticed it, but something that the book talks about is how when we seem to be doing great with not sinning, then all of a sudden, we have a series of sins. the book talks about how when sin is silent is when it is most dangerous. i found that rather insightful. 

there was much more in these first chapters, but that is all i will say now on the book.

however, something that this book is causing me to think about it what i will i teach on for my last sermon in one 28. there are a couple of things that i want to teach on that i wish that i would have know or realized during my high school years. i am most strongly considering teaching on the 10 plagues plus a little extra, looking at how God shows off his power at this time, or finding a passage in romans that talks more about mortifying the flesh, which is something that i wish i would have known more about and also would have sought after more during my younger years. 

it is not that are we to try and be better people, but we are to seek to be like Christ, which is perfect. we can not do it on our own, but we must rely upon the power of the Holy Spirit. it is not a casual stroll but an all out battle for our very souls which will live on for eternity, location of life depending on this life now.

that is something that is kinda scary. we live a short time on this earth, 90 years being a long time. and the time that we spend here, will determine where we are for the rest of eternity. this life is not something that we should take lightly, but it should be a serious time, for us to grow into who we want to be for eternity. the older i get, the faster time goes by. i don't want to be 40 looking back and wondering where my life went and asking myself if i have lived my life the way i want to. i want to look back when i am 80 and dying and be glad of how i lived and ready to run into the arms of my best friend and most trusted companion, Christ. 

i want to live a life that i can be proud of when i am old and wise, not one that i think is fun now and then regret after the endorphins wear off. 

glory to God

in acts 12 and genesis 41, a bad and a good response to praise is shown. in acts 12, herod makes a speak and the people praise him and calls him a god, he is then eaten by worms. while in genesis, pharaoh calls joseph wise, and joseph said that it isn't him, but God. joseph is then raised to second in command of all of egypt, second only to pharaoh. 

i liked this because it shows God's faithfulness to protect those who serve Him. though, the scary part is that God also punishes people for not doing the right thing. kinda makes you want to do what right.

Joy

i am currently reading a book on endurance, and the current and last chapter in on william wilberforce. i didn't know to much about him when i started to read it, but now i want to know more. he was summed up to be a man permeating with joy, in all circumstances. he was in terrible health, yet he played with his children and would laugh during meetings of parliament. he was always humming a hymn or singing. this really stuck out to me. i am not the most joyful of people, some would probably call me depressed or something along those lines. i'm not really, though i do generally look like it. though i am not sure that i could ever be as joyful as william, i know that i have the ability to, so this is something that i need to work on. he was a light to those around him through his joy, for people christians as being old, stuffy people and not people showing the joy of Christ. a lot of people missed that back then, and even know, but william got it. he had it. with out it, he could have very easily gotten depressed and died earlier, for his life was not one that should have been joyful except for the work of christ moving through him. 

i often look at the stuff that needs to be fixed and changed instead of the stuff that is working and in good order. i think that is one of the main reason for my pessimistic view, but also because i don't tend to look at things as a blessing from God but that it is just how life is. like the sunrise, every morning, if she remembers, my mom will look out the window at the sky to see it change colors and such, and she almost always says, "how beautiful" or something of that rendition. i need to start to look for and at the beauty of life and not at the problems of life. i even find myself doing this with people, i look at their flaws and at the things that bug me and not at their uniqueness and the stuff that makes them special. if i can look at people and not at their mistakes, i think that can make all the difference with me and how i treat people. though it will take God to do this in me because it will be reversing 18 years of habit, not an easy thing to do

friends

i would say that i do not have a whole lot of people that i enjoy to be around, though the ones that i do indulge in are great. for some reason, i tend to find new people who happen to not make friends, and i hook them up with people who are like them. it is kinda weird, i am not a hugely out going person, yet i enjoy meeting new people and helping people if i can. i am, perhaps, not the best of greeting parties, though i can make people trust me, which i am not sure how, it just happens. 

resolved

looking back on my life, i would say that the majority of what i did to have fun when i was young, was foolish, banal things that i now regret investing so much time into them. the thing that i most invested time in, that i most excused would be sleep. though it is essential to the body, the amount that i take in is not needed to the extent that i indulge it. another would be tv/video games/movies, of which i was squandered so much time on, that it is still amazing that i can actually think somewhat intelligently. so, instead, now i would like to spend more time doing things that i think will profit me in some way, either spiritually, mentally, or to have at least some measure of good entertainment. i would like to spend my time on studying the bible, reading spiritual literature, and playing the piano. the first two, i believe, fall under the first 2 categorizes, while playing the piano falls under the 3rd. one other thing that i will indulge in would be the reading of non-spiritual books, and that is simple for academic reasons, so that i can hopefully enhance my writing more and more. 

i am sure that i will have times where i fall back into doing the carnal things of this world, though i do hope that the general theme of my life is towards Christ and His kingdom. all those who read this, i hope you will work to keep me accountable to this cause and to also challenge yourself to further the kingdom; for we can not teach others what we ourselves do not know. 

ordination

so tonight, at Sean Higgens ordination, i was faced with the fact that i would love for it to be said of me that i was like Sean when i am his age. he really isn't am old guy, yet from what i have seen of him, he has shown wisdom and maturity of men far beyond his years. i, then started to look for the reasons that i wanted this, and i can down to either that i was prideful and that i wanted to be recognized for something, or that i want God's name to be praised. i would like to think it is the second one, and i think it is partially, though i also know that it has some to do with my pride. i'm used to being in the center, and now that i'm not really, i can see why i would want to reach out for something that would push me back up. the good thing though, is that i know that the more time i spend in God's word, the more i will want it to be for Him and have none of it to do with me. already in my life i have seen the changed, and i hope that it will continue to change till it is Christ that is seen through me and no longer me at all. 

saw the light

saul of tarsus was a man who wanted to imprison or kill all of the christians because they had betrayed their faith. on his way to damascus, he saw a bright light and God spoke to him. in this moment, God completely changed his life. saul was soon called paul and he would be come one of the greatest men in the early church. through saul's persecution of the church, the Word was spread, and then through paul's ministry, the Word was spread even farther. saul was a man, bent on destroying the earth, whom God used to touch the world. even most of the New Testament is written by him. i really like paul, there is so much to learn from him that it is simply amazing. he was educated by the best of jewish scholars and then God took him and used him for His own means. it's cool to see that God can and will use anyone to get His word spread. we don't even actually have to want to, because if God plans on using us, then we will be used. God will change us to love Him and we can't do anything about it. it is a great thing to think about. 

our God is great, and greatly to be praised

men of old

something that i see in myself and the young people around me is the challenge to think and challenge things in the mentality to learn. young people are always quick to challenge, but hardly ever in a way to better themselves and society or to push them closer to God. this mentality is something that i see in the men of history and i wish that i could be like them. i often think, "what is the difference between me and them? how can they do those things at that young of an age, and then i'm older and i haven't even considered doing those kinds of things" i look at men like Jonathan Edwards, Charles Spurgeon, John Knox, Charles Simeon, and many other reformers, puritans, and great men of faith, and they were not anything supernatural, they were just normal men who did what God had put upon their hearts to do. so, if they were normal men who did great things, why can't i do great things. i would love to impact the world for Christ. though one thing that i do have trouble with is boldness. my writings are one thing, but to actually speak with and in front of people, that is something i have trouble with. i want my name remembered under Christ, as one who fought for Him, not anything else. Christ is all that matters. i know must learn to trust Him and live completely for Him.

piano

well, i started to learn to play the piano today. i'm not very good, but it is fun. i'm excited to get my keyboard now so that i can set it up to the right height, i'm hoping that will help my wrist from hurting. 

piano is definitely harder then i thought it would be, but it isn't to bad, so i'm ok still. i still really want to play, so that is good. 

well, i'm really tired, so i'm going to bed now

a sheep to the slaughter

i was reading in Acts 8 tonight, which talks about philip going to the eunuch. the eunuch was reading a passage of the OT, Isaiah 53:7, which is 

"He was led as a sheep to slaughter; and as a lamb before its shearer is silent, so He does not open his mouth. In humiliation His judgement was taken away; who will relate His generation? for His life is removed from the earth"

not so much this quote from Isaiah, but the passage of Acts itself is what struck me with this. i was thinking about how the world would look on Christ for giving himself up for us, people past, present, and future. to someone normal, this would not make any sense what so ever. for someone to die, cruelly and quietly, that is amazing. to be innocent as well, completely boggles the mind. this just shows how great of a God and Savior we have. 

crush

to have a crush on someone is, perhaps, one of the stupidest things ever. having a crush completely blinds a person from making any rational decisions. it may be fun to have a crush and to be in a relationship, but in all reality, it is stupid. people just get hurt and nothing comes from them. so, instead of acting upon emotions, think, and then act in ways that you think best, and that you would know the adults around you would approve. it isn't wise to make decisions based upon your own experiences, for you are blinds and sugar-coat every situation.

enjoy their company, and just leave it at that, at least for a couple of years. that way, you are actually able to get to know them. it's works much better this way, from what i have seen.

work

for the most part, work is hard for me. my body doesn't really like me to do it. working, however, can bring a great source of accomplishment to one's life. to know that you have done your very best and to see the fruit of your work is a result that, i think, God has blessed us with. men like to get stuff done. another good thing about work is that it really reveals who you are. it is hard to be fake when you are tired, sore, hot, and wanting to stop. i don't really work well with others, it is something that i need to work on. i get very impatient when people don't act like i think that they should. i'm very used to being the youngest person at work, so when i work this people my age, i expect them to work like the people that i am used to working with, when in all reality, there isn't any way for them to do that. it's a stupid, foolish problem that i have. 

good kid

i was observing some young kids today and instantly in my head, i though, "oh, they are good kids." in all reality though, they aren't. they may be well-behaved and such, but they aren't really good. they are just as capable of messing up as the rest of us. i was a good kid when i was young. i'm not ignorant enough to say that i know all of my mistakes, but i know enough of them to know that i'm not a good kid. it's sad though, good kids are dismissed in some lessons because they are good, when they haven't gone through life before, they don't know how things will turn out, at least not as well as someone who has been through it before. this is the point of discipleship, to keep good kids good, and hopefully into "perfect" kids (positionally perfect, actual perfection comes later). so, grab a kid and pour your life into them, so that they don't have to make the same mistakes that you did.

God is good

i just got home from our high school bball game against highland prep, and God blessed us with a win tonight, which was nice, cuz it was our first. we have had games the last two nights now, and during both of the games, i have really been missing bball. generally, i just miss the adrenaline rush of playing hard and what not, but at tonight's game, i found myself missing the part of everyone cheering for the team, including me. i kinda am useless on the bench. then i got made at myself. the only thing keeping me from playing, is the thing that changed me the most for the good. my ICD has definitely slowed down my life and has made it so that i can't do something, but that means that i can focus on better things now. i am no longer distracted by sports and such. looking back, if i could change anything in my life, it would be the time that i idolized sports, for that was the time that a lot of my bad habits in the other areas in my life formed. i wasn't a bad kid, but i am not particularly proud of my younger years, i just hope that i will continue to change and be more like Christ. 

mothers will be mothers

my parents have been in Hawaii for the past week and just got back tonight. one of the first things my mom does when i come in is ask if i'm hungry, and then makes me my favorite, a grilled cheese sandwich. i find this humorous and quite nice. my mother is great, i love her. she is definitely a servant. which really shows me how i should act. i'm glad i have a mom like i have. i'm glad she is back.

sharps and flats

i would say that i am a person with very little if no musical talent, yet i am so grateful that God made music. at the moment, my favorite christian CD is Enfield, "o for that day" it has great music and even greater lyrics, i would say. it is a true pleasure to let it influence my ears. also, for the past couple of months, i have been listening to a great deal of classical music. the composers that i listen to, when they were alive, most everyone claimed to some belief in Christ, so most of the music was written for the church, though alot of also just written for the sake of music. the good thing is that i dont know which is which, so i listen to all of it as if it were for the church and to God, so it is great to listen to the beauty of it and then to imagine what the composer with thinking about when he wrote it, whether it was God Himself, or some aspect of nature or whatever, i just love it. i love putting the music to a picture in my head and to just let it wash over me, and to contemplate God the whole while. the music is somewhat distracting though when trying to do homework, but oh well :)

sin will haunt you

i read through Genesis 18-20 tonight and something interesting caught my eye. in chapter 19, sin catches up to people. the first half of the chapter is about the destruction of sodom and gamorrah. the people there were so hideously sinful, that God completely and utterly destroyed them. the second half is about how the daughters of Lot sinned with there father. from what i can gather from the chapter, Lot never knew what had happened because he was drunk (shows that you shouldn't drink). so, his daughters basically got away with the sin that they had committed. the thing is, their sin catches up to them in the generations to come. they each had a son, and those sons became 2 nations that eventually fought and killed many israelites, who are actually their cousins. so, through the sin of those two girls, the nation of israel was punished by them. this shows that your sins will find you out, and that God is in absolute control over everything, and He will bring about what He will bring about. there isn't anything that can stop what He wants done. don't forget that. 

stupid kid

looking back on my accomplishments in life, i realize that i was, am, and will hopefully not be, a rather ridiculous stupid kid who thought he knew all the answers. i took everything that i learned, put it through my head, and then tried to do it in a way that made sense to me, but was rather idiotic. i'm not hugely disgusted with myself, because i know i had the right motives usually, but it is rather sad to see how badly i failed. 

beating something broken won't fix it, so i need to move on with my life. my mistakes just haunt me at times

curse video games

perhaps the hardest life lesson that i have learned in my short life is one that i am coming to grasp now. it is that in real life, there is no do-overs, you don't get to try again, and you don't get to take things back. whatever you do, happens, it won't change and you won't get another chance to fix it. once it happens, its out there. the reason that this is called "curse video games" is the fact that i kinda grew up on video games and because of them, i have had it ingrained in my mind that whatever happens, i can try again until i get it right. when i was younger, i would never have said that i thought this way, but in looking back on my actions, i know that i did. there are decisions that i have made in my life that i regret now, and i know that i will regret them when i get older as well. i just pray that as time goes on, i learn from my mistakes and that i don't keep doing the same thing over and over again. 

to those who are younger then me, i implore you, see reason. everything that you do in this life, will effect what happens the rest of your life. you don't get any do-overs. 

to those who are older, i hope that you already see that this life is real and unchanging. i hope that you have better sense then i have had. if not, i can tell you that there is only one way around the guilt of your past demons; and that is through the saving blood of Christ. only he can forgive you and bring a peace. 

go forth and making good, life altering decisions, for anything else will only hurt you.

God knows what's best

my brother, jonathan sarr, james barnts, jonathan james, and i are all reading through the bible this year. tonight, while reading through matthew 2 a very interesting thing occurred to me. it's nothing new really, just something that struck me that is in a story that i have heard hundreds of times probably. it is that God told joseph to take mary and jesus to egypt because people a.k.a. herod, was trying to kill him. joseph had no idea what was going on, he just obeyed and in the end, it all turned out great and it all fulfilled all the prophesy. this is all really cool to me. i'm 18 now and about half way through my senior year in high school, so i am starting to think about having and family and such (haha, have to find a wife first, but yeah) and i don't know if i could just get up and move like that, it is a huge step of faith, and it works out, like it always does with God. i died about 9 months ago, and if i could, i would never change what happened to me. sure, i can't do alot of stuff that kids my age can do, but i am ok with that, i am in a better place then i was at, and i love it. my "event" woke me up to some stuff in my life, so i am grateful for it. people say they are sorry that this happened to me, i'm not, i might struggle with what i have to deal with at times, but when i am looking to God, everything is great. 

praise God

for everything

for He is great

don't forget it either :)

snow

recently, marysville has received huge amounts of snow, which is really cool. we even had a white christmas, and i don't remember the last time it actually snowed on christmas. it was insane. i was talking to a friend of mine a while back about the snow, and he was just saying how amazing it all was and how our great God is in charge of it all. it is a mind blowing phenomenon. the was that each snow flake is unique and special is really cool, considering that i probably saw, literally, a billion snow flakes, and to know that every one is different and beautiful. that is very spectacular. another thing that i was very grateful for is that every year since we moved into our new house, we lost power, but this year we didn't and we had more snow and more wind then all the other years, so that was a major blessing. just shows the providence of God and his blessing for us all. another thing that i really liked about the snow this year is how it blocked off our drive way. i know that is kinda a weird thing to like, but i liked it because it made it so that we had to basically stay at home and if we did leave, it was difficult, so we didn't leave much. now, that all means that we actually had a family christmas this year, which hasn't happened for awhile. it was just our family in our house, which was very nice. we haven't had time where we were all together and where we actually were around each other for a long time, if ever, i don't remember a time where we all stayed and played games together and spent time together, it was a very nice time for us.