So Where Do I Go From Here?

Anyone who has been around me much since I have gotten back from Ethiopia should have noticed that I have been more reserved as of late. This is mainly due to the fact that I have a lot on my mind and one of the major things that is on my mind is what am I going to do now that I am back? I don't want this trip to have happened and to not effect me, I want it to change me and I really think that it has. I am getting a little ahead of myself though, no one has been in my mind for the past 2.5 years so no one would know where I am coming from in order to get to where I am at now. So we regress... 2.5 years ago, I started to think about what I wanted to do with my life and I realized that I wanted to do ministry. I wasn't quite sure how this was going to turn out or anything, but I knew that ministry is what I was meant to do with my life. I am not called to a simple life or a "normal" life, God wouldn't have done everything that He has done in my life just so that I can live a simple life. How many people do you know that He kills and brings back to life just so that they can go on the same way that they always have? there aren't many. So I knew I was supposed to do something and I believed it was ministry. So I started to pursue a pastor career. I did a youth ministry internship and started to study and read books, all of which I totally loved. There was something that I was missing though and that I knew I needed if i was going to continue in this career: a heart. I needed to love the people. I didn't really have a love for the people that were around me, sure, I care for them, but I had a hard time relating to them and wanting to care for them. So I started to pray. I asked God to give me a heart and a love for a people. I didn't care where they were at or who they were, just a love for them so that I knew where I was meant to go. So i started to pray, and I prayed, and prayed some more, and I saw that my love for people in generally started to grow, and I was excited. God was working in me. This was all happening over the past 2.5 years. these prayers and loves have been growing. I then went to Ethiopia. I then fell in love. I saw people who had nothing but Jesus and it was totally amazing. These people knew how to live, and they needed help. Perhaps I am not the best person for the job, I know that I am not the best person for the job or the best suited or the most gifted, but I know that I love those people and that God can use anyone who is willing to let Him use them. So this brings us up to today. I know that I love the poor, especial the kids. I absolutely love them and want to care for them. Orphans will always have a special place in my heart. Every time I see them, I want to just love on them. So with all this on my heart, I set out. I don't quite know the path that I am going to take yet but I do know the destination that I am headed for: somewhere. I want to work with poor kids in other countries that have nothing because I love them even without knowing them. I want to share Christ with them.

Now, I have a long ways and a long time before I will be there, that is where you come in; if you are reading this, I need to you pray. Pray that God will give me wisdom, a path to walk, and support. I say support but I am not talking about money (at least at the moment) I need people to encourage me with this, not false or weak encouragement but heart-felt, because they believe in me. I need prayer support. I need people who will come along side of me and who will help me with all of this. It is all new to me and I am a young guy, I need help.

So please pray and ask God to work in me